In any ecosystem, it is important for all parts to be well balanced and have the things they require to thrive. When one part of the ecosystem is not getting what it needs, all parts suffer and have to compensate. Our families are no different. There is even an area of study that suggests the family can be studied like an ecosystem because it follows the same principles. The only way that a family can thrive is if all parts of it are receiving the things they need. Strong families grow like strong ecosystems, with each individual part contributing.
Thinking of it simply, take The Lion King for example (cue “The Circle of Life” music).
Mufasa explains to Simba how the antelope eat the grass, the lions eat the antelope, and when they die, the lions fertilize the soil (still seems like the antelopes drew the short stick, but it works). We see later when the hyenas are taking for granted all the bounty of their ecosystem that it leads to the land becoming barren. Their ecosystem suffered for a while, which means all parts of it suffered until everyone was getting what they needed.
In the same way, a family suffers if everyone isn’t getting what is needed. So how do we grow strong families and support each member?
Growing Strong Parents
Parents are the basis of our familial ecosystem. Since they are the foundation, a lot of the responsibility to make sure the ecosystem thrives falls on their shoulders. They are responsible to make sure that temporal needs are provided, children are loved and taught both academically and spiritually, and interactions between family members are either positive or resolved positively.
Because of these responsibilities and the great love parents have for their children, other family members are usually put before themselves. This is necessary sometimes, but when it becomes the default setting, the family ecosystem starts to suffer.
We as parents have needs that are important to our well-being. Taking care of our bodies, minds, and spirits are not luxuries that we may only indulge in when there is “extra” time (Ha!). Just as one part of an ecosystem can support another part until equilibrium is restored, we can only put off our own needs for so long before there is a collapse. We pour so much into our families that we need to take time to refill our own cups. Don’t fall into the trap of thinking that you can keep the family running smoothly without attending to your own needs. Strong families need strong parents.
Growing Strong Children
Children should each be considered as a separate and important part of the family ecosystem. While we sometimes group them together, they each have their own personalities and needs. Anyone with more than one child knows that the parenting style or guidance that works perfectly for one child, is not going to be as great of a fit for the others.
We especially know for our children that our gifted learners, struggling learners, and neurotypical children all have different needs when it comes to education. That is why we all wanted to homeschool! While we may be familiar with these differences educationally, we should incorporate them into all aspects of our family life.
Children need to recognize that while they are not the leader of the family, they can still contribute in meaningful ways by adding their strength and good example to the other members of the family.
Growing Strong Families as a Whole
Differences in weaknesses and strengths among all family members should be recognized and embraced. That is why God put us together as a family! Weaknesses can be seen as opportunities for others to serve the people they love. Different strengths can be celebrated and added to one another to accomplish a much larger goal. And when we all take time to make sure that individual needs are met, our families can grow in love and strength as individual members and as a whole.
Growing Strong in Community
SPED Homeschool recognizes that special education homeschooling families need to grow at their own pace, but that they grow better when they can be supported within a larger community. This is why the new SPED Strong Tribes program we’re raising funds to start in 2019 will focus on helping families grow and thrive.
To find out more about the SPED Strong Tribes program and how you can help us raise the funds we need to start creating local tribes that will strengthen families, check out our Fundrazr campaign.
For more information on the five basic foundations we will be building into our new SPED Strong Tribes, check out all the blogs in this series:
Homeschooling Families Strengthened by Togetherness
Homeschooling Families Strengthened by Respite and Opportunities
Homeschooling Families Strengthened by Networking
Homeschooling Families Strengthened by Growth
Did you know SPED Homeschool is 100% donor funded?
(all donations are tax-deductible)